“...may our daughters be like graceful pillars, carved to beautify a palace.”
-Psalm 144:12

an endless devotion...

i have been fighting to remain in love.
to remain to love.
real enough.
and transparent enough.
because i am human, and loving people pass offense, pass insecurities, pass flaws, pass differences is not easy.
i talk to God....too!
it’s comforting to know that we have access to Jesus, if we posture our hearts according to His word— we get all the confirmation through and through. He doesn’t leave us high and dry. to die. in all of this He has been compassionate to my questions. filling me up with grace. despite my emotions my God shows up in sight.
not in spite.
i’ve cried tears of defense. reckless thinking— take back the offense. yet God is faithful calming the nature in my reflex. i know what’s next. i am on the field at the edge of a mountain claiming the victory that God has given me.
is it not me, He called? out of the darkness and into His light.
He is to good for me to go back.....
back; to the girl that spoke out of insecurity, to the girl that spoke out of hurt, to the girl that spoke to get a reaction. Causing my heart to lose traction.
God forgive me for, I haven’t been easy to love. yet in Your presence my heart melts like water.
every beat in my heart fears the art of failing my body but Your grace does not allow me to suffer. You put me back, and show me how to love. just as You have.
i don’t have to work for this kind of love
i don’t have to be forced to know this kind of love
i delight in Your love...
“to faithful, quiet, forever longings after You.”

that is what I know... what I love...
i find there is freedom in Jesus.
freedom to be myself.
freedom to ask Him for direction, 
and freedom to walk into a new season.
there is no and never will be any condemnation in Him.
you see, moving on means going forward
in all of God’s timing.
yet I am sensitive to my heart’s natural reactions, because this does not just include me.
this devotion to my own heart
this devotion is for my family
and for the ones who helped me cultivate my passions.
this devotion to God is endless.......... 

He still carries out,
His agreement that He has arranged for me.
every detail is beautiful.
it is filled with humble beginnings.
full of hope and love.
with glimps of eternity
and with my heart full of grace, 
i follow Him knowing this devotion is real. 


  “Is it not my family God has chosen? Yes, He has made an everlasting covenant with me. His agreement is arranged and guaranteed in every detail. He will ensure my safety and success.”
-2 Samuel 23:5       

Heart Check

MY Malu